Mast Laughing

Attitude rocks.
"I Failed in some subjects in xam,but my frnd pased in all. Nw, he is an engineer in microsoft & i am the owner of microsoft"-Bill gates
Believe in urself...
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Doctr-tabiyat kaisi hai
Santa-pehle se zyada khrab hai
Doc-dawai kha li thi
Santa:nai dawai ki sheeshi bhari hui thi
Dr-i mean dawai le li thi
Santa-ji apne di mne le li.
Dr-bewkoof dwai pee li thi?
santa-nai dwai to lal thi...
Dr-abe pagal dwai ko pee lia tha? santa-nai peelia to mjhe tha :-)
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1 murde se jab uski dastan puchhi gai to usne kuchh is tarah bayan ki- hume to apno ne luta gairo me kahan dum tha,
Meri haddi bhi waha tuti jahan hospital band tha,
Mujhe woh ambulance mili jisme petrol kam tha,
Mujhe rikshe me bithaya kyonki kiraya kam tha,
Mujhe Dr. ne uthaya narso me kaha dum tha,
Mujhe jis bed par litaya uske niche bam tha,
Mujhe bam ne udaya goli me kanha dam tha,
Mujhe sadak par he dafnaya kyonki kabristan me bhi function tha...
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Santa Cricket Khel Kar Aaya.
Banta:Kitne Run Banaye?
Santa:Century Hone Me 99 Run Baki The Or me Out Ho Gya.
Banta: shit Yar.
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Consequences of American life style..
wife rushed in 2 house screaming her husband-"Darlng, Come quick.. Ur kids n my kids r beating our Kids.!!"
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JOKE OF THE DAY

Diff.between new couples & old couples? New couples "LIPS"mila k sote h,or old couples "HIPS" mila k..

Definition of Cigarette - A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other.

Lady 2 dentist: Oooh.. daant nikalwane se to pregnant hona jada aasan hota hai.
Dentist: jaldi soch lo fir me chair usi hisaab se set karunga....!!!!!
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Pati k Marne k Next day,Wife Ne Paper Me Ad diya
"Antim Sanskar Me Shamil Hue Sab Logo Ko Thanx"
FROM:
REENA(32)
Height-5'4",36/24/36 Gora Rang
*Bacche Nhi hai
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A VERY FUNNY QUOTE
"Come like a Racer,
Sit like a Yogi,
&
Go like a King...!
Nw u'll ask "Whats funny?
This slogan was written on a....
TOILET DOOR
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man:bhagwan india se america tak sadak bna do.
God: kyu....
man:vaha mera beta rehta h or meri wife uske paas jana chahti h..
God:ye mushkil h or kuch mango..
man: meri wife ki budhhi badal do..
God:sadak sigle line banani h ya double line...
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POLICE JOKES- A Traffic cop stops a guy for speeding.'I've been waiting all day for you,' says the cop. The guy replies, 'Well I've got here as fast as I can.'
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sms2010

History prof was on leave
So science prof was askd 2
prepar history Q paper
Studnts stunnd seein 1 Q
DSCRIBE JHANSI ki RANI WIT A NEAT DIAGRAM & LABEL D PARTS.
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Teachr: Main kisi par bhi 1 nazar dal k bta sakti hu k wo mere bare me kya soch raha h.
1 baccha: Miss jab apko pta chal jata hoga toh badi sharm ati hogi na;
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LOVE JOKE
Difference btw biology and sociology.
A-When the baby looks like his dad, its BIOLOGY.
When the baby looks like the neighbour its SOCIOLOGY.
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RIDDLE
Name 3 consecutive days without using the words Monday,Tuesday,Wednesday,Thursday,Friday,Saturday or Sunday?
Ans-Yesterday,Today and Tomorrow.
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OFFICE BLUES
SID-Y did u quit ur last job?
MANGU-Sickness
SID-Wat was it?
MANGU-My boss was sick of me.
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OFFICE BLUES
Notice by HR- We will not accept ur doctors statement as proof.
We believe that if u are able to go to the doctor...
You are able to go to work.
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JOKE OF THE DAY

Ladki: Condom dena.
Dukandar: Kis liye ?
Ladki: tere Baap
ko Gift dungi taaki tere jaise kam dimaag wala, dusra c*hutiya paida na ho!

OFFICE BLUES
CEO to employees
If you work hard this year
I will give you cheques for Rs. 50,000.
If you work hard again next year,
I'll sign those cheques
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Muskarate chehron ko bhi gam ho sakta hai...... Muskarate chehron ko bhi gam ho sakta hai .......... . Lawaris wastuain na chuain bomb ho sakta hai ... :))
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Jokes
Patient:Doctor I am very worried about the outcome of this eye operation.Wat are the chances? Doctor: Don't worry you wont be able to see the difference.
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Interviewer: Congrats, u r selectd...
Ur 1st Yr Salary is Rs 60,000 & Next Year it'll Be 1 lakh...
Manpreet: Ok sir..!!
Thank u very much.
I will join Nxt year.
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Ultimate bezzati
Garmi me Bus Stop pe Log bus K intizaar me khade the,
1 bhikari aya,
Sub se paise liye
Or
Taxi me baith kar chala gaya.!!
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QUESTION of the DAY
jab PYAR aur
JANG me sab kuch
JAYAZ hai..
to PYAR me hone wala BACCHA NAJAYAZ KYU Hai...
jago grhak jago..
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Take this stR'ess test.
By A'nswering
these tWo questions..
1. Which mouse
has two legs?
Mickey mouse !
2. Which duck has 2 legs?
If you answered
Donald Duck
You are under stress...
BeCause
All ducks have two legs:-P
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SANTA TE BANTA

SANTA flight mein pilot ka headphone cheen raha tha.. Pilot: Ye kya kar rahe ho?SANTA: Saalo ticket hum le..Aur Gaane tum suno...
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Santa- Bhai Jaldi Jao Tumhare Ghar Mein Barsat Ka Pani Ghus Gaya Hai !
Banta- Kyu Jhuth Bolte Ho, Ghar K Chaabi To Mere Paas Hai.
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Santa: Phone pe itni dheemi aawaz me kiss se baat kar raha hai?
Banta: Behen hai.!
Santa: To phir itni dheemi aawaz me kiss liye?
Banta: Teri hai isliye. :-)
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Meri engagement ki Date fix ho gayi hai 25 july ko hai.

Santa ki Girl Frnd usko itna keh kar chali gayi.
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SANTA kele k chhilke se fisal kar gir gaya
Aage phir doosre chilke se fisal k gir gaya.
Ab teesre chhilke ko dekh k wo bola...?
Shit, Ab fir girna padega.
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SANTA sukhe talab me BOAT chala rha tha
BANTA-Aise logo ne hi hmara nam khrab kr rkha h agar mujhe tairna ata to whi jake marta sale ko.
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Santa k pas 1 kauva (crow) tha Wo bahut mulayam tha
To usne apne kauve ka naam kya rakha hoga?
?
Microsoft (my-crow-soft) ise kehte h technical msg.G m
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Santa naukri dhoond raha tha,
videsh se reply aa gaya...
Saare k saare bade khush...
Daru-sharu di party de dali...
Dost puchne lage bhai bata to
kaun si company hai, kitni salary hai....
Santa: English me letter aaya hai, main tuhanu translate kar ke sunana haan

"You Do not meet"
tum to milte hi nahin ho.

"our requirements"
Hume to bahut zarurat hai.

"no further correspondence"
Aage chitthi patri di jarurat nahi,

"will be entertained"
Bahut khatir ki jayegi...!
:-):-)

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SANTA dialled a phone no.
A computrizd female voice said..'apke paas paryapt balance nai h..'
SANTA - Bas baby..
tumse baat ho jati h itna hi kafi h...:-)
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Santa ki behen ko daaku utha le gaye.
Logo ne kaha ki daaku khatarnak hai,
khali hath mat jana behen ko bachane!
Fir
kya
Santa 2 kilo aam le gaya..!
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Punjab Airline di Airhostess: sir kee lawoge? Banta: badam milk, kheer, bread pakora with tea
Airhostess: sir tusi jahaaz te aaye ho prabhat feri te Nahi.
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SANTA London ke Hotel mein murga khane gaya,
lekin murge ka english word bhul gaya.
Waiter-What do u like 2 have sir??
SANTA -1 plate egg ke Papa please...