Fun jokes

Jokes
Teacher 2 santa: Jis admi ko sunai na de use English me kya kahenge?
Santa: Jo marzi keh do...Usko konsa kuch sunai dega....!!
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Doctor to his patient:Oh,you seem to work very hard,what is your profession?
Patient:I try house breaking.
Doctor:Then better change to pick-pocketing!
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CRAZY QUOTES
A Mother takes 20 years to make her son INTELLIGENT...BUT
It takes A GIRL 2 minutes to make him look stupid.
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CHANGU-Wat kind of dog is tat ?
MANGU- Police dog.
CHANGU- He doesn't don't look like a police dog.
MANGU- Of course he doesn't. He does undercover work.
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Wash ur Mobile
Cut it Into Small Pices
Fry it
Add Spices N Some Oil
ur Mobile Pickle is ready
apKe Mobile Se Sms to Hote nhi achar hi dal lijiye....
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(LOVE EXAM) Wo___bhi kya___thi, jis___me wo___thi us___k basne se mere dil ki___'___ thi. In 7blankMe 1hi word ata h wo word kya hai? rply its a chalange.
Ans-Dhadkan
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Jahan Ki Gurbat Me Sukun Nahi Ayega.
Gam-E-Tohin Se Kubul Nahi Ayega.
Maklul Ki
Fitrat He Ye Kafir,
Dimag Fat Jayega Par Sher Samaj Nahi Ayega..
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Santa Banta se: Bhai ye khushiyan kya hoti hain? Banta: Pata nahi bhai, meri to kam umar me hi shadi ho gayi thi.
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American ne India ka masaledar dinner liya or agli subah toilet se niklte hi bola,Ab samjha?,Indians Q pani se dhote hai..Tissue pepar to aag pakad lega.
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If i die n go 2hevn n god asks me wats my last wish,i wil pause 4a while 2 luk 4u n,wen i c u r cryin i wud say prabhu ye drama kar rahe hein,inhe b bula lo...
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Teacher: prsang sahit vyakhya karo-"tenu jhapia pava jee karda"
Student: Ye line bollywood k prasidh kavi sant shri akshay kumar ji ki rachna 'sing is king' ki prasidh kavita "jee karda" se li gayi h, Is kavita mein kavi jb bhi devi katrina ko gulabi rang k kapdo mai nachte hue dekhte h to unka sabar toot jata h aur wo kehte hai hey devi mera tenu jhapia paan nu bda jee karda h, Aur in lines se hmko kavi k kamine hone ka ehsaas hota h...
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Student: sir ye MARDANA KAMZORI kya hoti h? Teacher: Beta Agr Aap k khwab mai koi Ladki aye or waha pr B uski IZZAT bach Jaye..to Ise MRDANA KAMZORI kehte he.
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LITTLE KUKI
KUKI-Even the President sits with his head bowed in front of my dad
SID-Wow,Wats ur dad?
KUKI-He is a barber.
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Santa samundar me dahi daal raha tha
Banta-kya kr rhe ho?
Santa-Lassi bana raha hu
Banta-isi liye log hum par joke banate hai
Itni Lassi tera Baap Piyega?..
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JOKE
At a party..
Someone yelled-All married guys plz stand next to d person who has made ur life worth living
The bartender was almost crushed to death.
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Walk on ur own path
love in ur own ways
talk in ur own words
do wat ur heart says...
N den,
1 day ur parents will say
NIKALJA GHAR SE.. ;-)
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Some foolish people say: "Behind every succesful man, there is a woman". But how many knows the fact- 'Women choose Only SUCESSFULL men'
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JOKES
Guy- Every time I have an argument with my wife, she gets HISTORICAL.
Friend- You mean HYSTERICAL?
Guy- No, historical. She brings up my past.
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LOVE v/s EXAM.
LOVE: Lots of thoughts in mind,bt no guts 2 express.
EXAM: Lots of guts 2 express, bt no thoughts in mind....
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Iss sansar mein sirf post-men kyun hain,
post-women kyun nahi hain?
kyoki wo delivery dene me 9 mahine lagati hain..!!
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FUN
Name 3 stages of life?
TEENAGE-Have Time n Energy..but No Money
WORKING AGE-Have Money n Energy..but No Time
OLD AGE-Have Time n Money..but no Energy.
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FUN WITH CHANGU
CHANGU- I just saw a guy stealing my car.
POLICE- Did you get a good look at him?
CHANGU- No but I saw his NUMBER PLATE.
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FUN
I wanted 2 put sumthing incredibly
Beautiful,
Sweet,
Nice,
Sensitive
And Funny
On your screen,
But unfortunately
I DON'T FIT ON UR SCREEN.
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Arranged marriage is
"While u r walking unfortunately a snake bites u"
But
Love marriage is gaoing to the snake & saying,
Katle...katle aja katle na:-D
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FUN
Great students are like US
work on d principle of rockets
It doesnt mean we aim for d SKY
It means we dont start studying unless our tails on FIRE.
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1 Sardar apne sir pe Tota bitha kar ja rha tha.
Raste me 1 aadmi ne rok ke pucha,
Bhai ye konsa Janwar hai.
TOTA bola-SARDAR hai saala...
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Ek SARDAR let kar gane ga rha tha, 2-3 gane ga kar wo ulta let kar gane laga. 2nd sardar : yar ulta let kar kyo gane laga. 1st: pehle A side thi ab B side hai..
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FUN
Genie to MANGU
Ask for anything,
But ur wife will get double of wat u get...
MANGU-Give me A CRORE n beat me till Im HALF DEAD.
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FUN
BOY-Ur the sunshine of my life,
Without U life is cloudy,
Ur in my heart like rain water 4 barren land
GIRL-Janu,Is this a proposal or WEATHER REPORT?
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"Alcohol contains female hormones"
PROOF: aftr drinkng..
1. men talk unnecesarily,
2.become over emotional
3.drive badly
4.stop thinking
5. Fight 4 nothing
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Read at ur own risk.
Who is the leader of ducks?
?
Who?
Who
Ans:Frog!
Y?
Why?
Because frog is
"Main-duck"!!
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